This is my space and these are my thoughts

Yep, I sat around and didn't do any homework today. Yay for me...darn...I think I do hafta go do some now.

Anyways...data...went okay I guess, didn't bother checking my mark. Accounting, screwed up the test. I completely forgot how to do a 10-mark question.

Aw...I want Yu-gi-oh cards too. Yes, I know I'm a nerd but hey, I've been watching the show LONG before anyone else even started liking it. Speaking of anime, I miss Escaflowne, I thought it was good...ooh...and there was an Escaflowne song I like too...I recommend you download Yubiwa, it's very good.

So, gotta get quidance to fax Waterloo tomorrow. Darn, I probably won't get anything from them until Monday or Tuesday. Okay, now people are telling me to go to Waterloo. I know, you shouldn't let friends influence where you go cuz it's about the education but really, Waterloo was one of my top choices and the fact that it has co-op makes it so much more appealing. Hmm....what to do, what to do?

posted by j.why @ 1:52 AM 0 comments

Done the report. Haven't started the presentation or studying for accounting test. I really don't want to pull an all-nighter but it looks as though I just have to. Poo. I'm just taking a short break before I break down.

You know what's sad? When you realize that someone you consider a very good friend (possibly a best friend?) doesn't care about you. Like, at all. How depressing is that?

You kow what good, though? Eating egg tart at 1:30 in the morning. Yum...buttery crust.

I really envy peple who are able to deal with stress so well. I'm...so near breakdown point...very close..I'm just counting down the days until school is over. The sad part is? I know that once I go off to university, a lot of the people that I talk to now won't be there and I won't make much of an effort to keep in touch with many of them. While it's true that I do have my group of close friends but there are so many other people that I won't be seeing.

I nearly broke down when I got those thin envelopes from Waterloo today. And then I opened them...I wasn't accepted because my English Language test marks were insufficient? Hmm...now since when did I have to take the TOEFL? Funny how I never knew that English wasn't my first language. Good thing I called them back. Thanks to someone who was there with me when I got those rejections, although you were probably only there so that you could laugh at me. So...gonna sit myself down with my acceptances this weekend and decide where to go. First choice...Western...second...UT/Waterloo..*sigh*

Got invited to a FOB b-day party this saturday. The thing is, I really don't know them too well and the ones that I do know won't be there because they'll be dancing in a performance! So...to go or not to go? Seems kinda disrespectful to not go just because I think I'll feel uncomfortable but then again, would they really care if I went? Besides...I already agreed to chip in for the present. Hmm....

Trying to keep a positive attitude. It works when I don't think about my problems. Then again, when my problems to resurface in my consiousness, I panic. I literally feel my heart squeeze and feel the panic race through my veins. Ugh, the horror.

posted by j.why @ 1:42 AM 0 comments

You know what's the cutest? When people snore. Not that loud, chainsaw snore like my dad's but that soft snore that's really just a little buzz. What's even cuter is when people don't even realize that they snore.

Too discouraged to work anymore on data. I'll continue tomorrow and pull an all nighter. *sigh* Time to do other homework.

posted by j.why @ 2:25 AM 0 comments

Yay....my data presentation's actually on Thursday! I freaked myself out thinking it was going to be tomorrow and I'm no where near done! Okay, one more day to prepare, though it's not really preparation if I'm not even done! It's more like...one more day to get it done.

Ok, so I got accepted into UT though not into my college of choice. Oh poo...now I'll get an ugly residence if I go there and live downtown. Screw you New College, you're ugly! So I'm just waiting for one more university, two programs. Come on, Waterloo, show me some love. So what are my chances of getting into those programs? Slim to none. *sigh*

posted by j.why @ 10:30 PM 0 comments

Data presentation on Wednesday. I'm so screwed for it. Totally not ready. Hopefully can finish presentation and report by then. Talking in short sentences. Don't know why. Weird.

You know, I totally envy Peter. At a time when everyone is so stressed and so emotionally drained, he's pretty much just cruisin' through life. Everyone is suffering while he's just sitting back, laughing at everyone. Oh, how I wish I was him right now.

Thanks to everyone who showed concern for me. I'm still trying to deal but I'm just not ready yet to let people know what happened, I'm sorry. I'm still =( right now but thing's will be okay. They always are.

posted by j.why @ 2:45 AM 0 comments

I've been looking forward to prom for so long that I think that I made it out to be much more than it should have been. Did I have fun? Partly, yes. Majority of the time, no, I don't think I can say that I did. So much that I wanted or expected didn't happen. And things that I didn't want to happen, did. I wish the picture taking didn't take so long, I wanted to dance, to forget all my troubles and just move to the music. In the end, I just ended up dancing four slow songs and about 15 minutes of fast songs. I should probably go clubbing sometime soon, I need to release some energy. I've had so much pent up inside me for so long that I just need to dance it all away.

Thanks tailz for doing so much for me. If it wasn't for you, the after-party would've been an even bigger bust than it was.

Everyone looked so beautiful and handsome at prom. I wish I took more pictures so that I could have those memories forever. I know that prom was happy for other people and I want to have pictures of that.

Things will be okay. Everything will work out the way they were meant to work out. They may not work out the way we all want them to, but one way or another, they will end in their rightful conclusions.

posted by j.why @ 2:06 AM 0 comments

I've been in a deep sleep the last few weeks and I finally woke up last night. I had the most wonderful dream that was also my worst nightmare. Everything happened so quickly that it is all a blur, but when I slow it down and really look at it, I can see everything that happened, all the details, every little movement. Knowing that it happened makes me smile but knowing that it ended makes my heart cry out. I want to let go, I need to let go, but I can't bring myself to do that. I know I'm just torturing myself but I can't bring myself to stop.

posted by j.why @ 1:59 AM 0 comments