Saturday, June 28, 2003

You know what f-ing sucks? I've been waiting and excited to get a laptop for months now and my dad promised me that I can get one. But now that my dad actually bought a laptop, my brother says two sentences and all of a sudden, that laptop is his while I get a stupid old desktop. I hate being treated so unfairly! It makes me so angry that something I've been looking forward to for so long is suddenly not mine. AAAGRFGGGTHEW!!!! Like what the hell? So what if I'm in my first year of university and he's in his last? What, my education isn't as important now? Yeah ok, I get it one year afterwards but what the hell? Why the hell would I want an old one when I was supposed to get a new one in the first place? Is it supposed to make me happy that what I was supposed to get is being delayed one full year? It's not like my university stuff isn't screwed up enough already. Yeah I sound like a spoiled, selfish brat so I don't f-ing care. I was supposed to get it. My brother always gets favoured for everything. When we first got satellite, who got it in his room before everyone else? And he isn't even the oldest sibling or anything! When I was supposed to be getting a new TV, all of a sudden, it goes into my brother's room when it arrives because "it looks better there" and I get his old run down piece of crap. Now I get a piece of crap of a desktop that I didn't even want in the beginning. Do you know how hard to is to have something you have been looking forward to having for months suddenly taken away from you because of some stupid little excuse he makes up about how much he needs it more? So yeah, it's easy to get stolen. But what, it's not easy for it to be stolen if he has it? UT's a much bigger school then Waterloo with a much higher chance of the stupid thing being stolen. I am so angry about it right now and they don't even care enough to notice. Like what the hell??? That stupid thing was supposed to be mine! I hate these stupid patriarchal, male-oriented Chinese families! Just because he's a guy doesn't mean that there's be less of a chance that it'll be stolen and it doesn't mean that I don't need it. Like fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No matter what, 5 months of my waiting doesn't even compare to 5 minutes of my brother's shit that he tells my dad! I hate him! I hate him! I hate him! I hate him!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah I angry, I'm so angry that I've got tears coming out of my eyes. I hate how unfair everything is! I hate how my life always gets screwed over like this! What? Is this punishment cuz I chose to go to Waterloo instead of UT like how my dad wanted me to? Now I don't even have a place to live in Waterloo because they f-ed me over. Yeah, they made the mistake with my application. It wasn't my mistake. I never filled oout ANY form about how many years I've been in a Canadian school. I don't need TOEFL, especially with an 88% in English! FUCK EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!

You are GILL!
What Finding Nemo Character are You?

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Sunday, June 22, 2003

Aiya....one more exam to go then I'm free! Free! Of course, that would only be if Waterloo does something about me so that I stop stressing bout that. Can't wait for my spa day...*sigh*...that would be so sweet...and so expensive...haha...ah well, what can I do if that's the "budget" that we set for our grad trip, huh?

I haven't really studied for econ though my exams in 11 hours.

*sigh* You know what's the weirdest? You think you finally know someone and then something new just totally pops outta nowhere and takes you completely by surprise. *sigh* Learned some stuff about myself too. I just don't want to see anyone get hurt, ok?

Did you know that Chapters has 7 shelves dedicated to books on sex and sexuality? Aside from the many variations of the Kama Sutra and Tantric sex books, they even have books about how to give the ultimate head. Of course, they have two books on it...how to give the ultimate fellatio (going down on the guy) and the ultimate cunnilingus (going down on the girl). And they have diagrams and pictures too! LOL, don't ask me what I was doing in that section of Chapters. ;)

Anyways...back to studying.