This is my space and these are my thoughts

And as predicted, I have begun to re-enter a depressive state of mind. And as predicted, it's happening because of calculus. Ok, I'm really not that down, just extremely mad and discontent at the way the teacher treats the class.

Ok, if the majority of the class fails a test, does that not indicate something to the teacher? Perhaps the test was too hard and was at a level above any other questions the students ever did from worksheets or textbooks? Perhaps she can't teach and pretty much only answers questions that her favourites ask. Ok, so my class isn't as smart as other classes but that doesn't mean that everyone in both classes are at a failing level.

It's one thing to fail a test and completely another to have the teacher rub it in ur face how dumb you are. You know what she did? First thing when we walked in the classroom door this morning, she hands us a sheet that tells us to find the errors that were made. I was thinkin, ok, she realized people did bad, she's giving us a little but of practice/review. But u know what? Those mistakes on that sheet? They're straight off of people's tests! Honestly, could she not have at least make questions with similar mistakes so that people didn't have to be so embarassed at the mistakes they made and feel so dumb about it? Did she have to repeatedly tell the class how dumb they are? Ok, if no one got over 70%, fine, give the class some review and maybe a second evaluation to perhaps bring their mark up. Why do you have to spend a whole class taking up the test questions and then telling the class how dumb they are while you're doing that? Yes, people should have the background from previous grades and most people do,they just made careless mistakes. And she says "I'm not saying that people don't make mistakes, you just have to minimize the number of mistakes you made" Well, guess what? How can we do that when the test is so long that people didn't even finish it, let alone have time to check over the test for those careless mistakes?

Yesterday, before I even knew my results from that test, I came out crying because I already knew I failed it. GEEZ! Can't she just give us a break? Looking over Lim's test, it seemed even easier than Colarusso's, though his TIPS question was hard. But overall, it was easier. It's not like I'm not already doing bad enough in that course! I was barely pushing an 80 and I was worried about that bringing down my mark! Now that I've FAILED a test, my marks going to drop even lower, my average is going to drop even lower and I'm not going to get into any university!

I know my math skills are weak but they aren't that weak. To other people, 80's aren't bad. They're actually considered above average. Yeah, the class failed one test but that doesn't make them dumb. Maybe she should think about this: even the people who got high marks on the last two tests failed this one. Does that not indicate something when power rule is even easier than first principle? Maybe it's not the students who are dumb. Maybe it's the teacher that gave a test that was too hard!

Ok, so I expected to do worse on this test than on my past one's cuz I only did about half of the assigned homework, but that doesn't equate to a fail! Maybe a 70 I could accept or even a 60! But a fail? And comparing to the rest of the class, of which there are smart people who do do their work, I wasn't on really on the lower end of the test. How can she expect us to not make mistakes when she kept telling us to work faster and faster on the test? Doesn't she know that being speedy causes careless mistakes to be made?

I've ranted and raved for a long time. I should be getting back to studying. After all, I still have an accounting test tomorrow, an economics quiz, and a calculus in-class assignment. Plus, a report to work on though I doubt I'll get that done until the weekend. I hate the mid-term crunch. You'd think teachers would be smart enough to coordinate their activities and not bunch everything together at the same time.

I'd rather be in Hong Kong right now and deal with SARS than deal with this! I'd rather have to spend a month sitting in isolation in my home than to face the stress and the wicked dragon teachers. I haven't slept earlier than 3 every night. I was ready to burst out in tears again today cuz I'm so stressed.

AHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

posted by j.why @ 12:12 AM